nice rainy sleep in today. woke up real early tho. like during first period of school. haha. watched oprah. man that woman gives out freebies like free! (wow.) i would LOVE to go for her show. like in that one show, the audience got a dessert, a cookbook, a set of pots and pans, a home fixing kit thing, a branded outfit (inclusive of shoes/accessories and a handbag!), some estee lauder facial stuff, perfume, ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS worth of furniture and an exercise ball! wtf man. but it's damn nice to watch. haha. then did some math. not bad i managed to kind of catch up a little bit on my timetable. then took an early afternoon break and stumbled on oprah again. oprah primetime this time, and i declare johnny depp and kate winslet the hottest man woman on earth. (chad michael murray is the hottest guy. haha) watched the nanny (brings back memories!), frasier (pretty damn funny). then it was back to work. less productive this time tho.
i hate the nights. so dark, so cold, so filled with apprehension about the next day :(
gonna do an econs essay later, i hope!

the two you did, and the two i didnt.

cool beans! just discovered how to kind of use pisca. :D

fridays are going back to becoming frydays :( this last fry day was like passively bad. i can't seem to be able to write essays. i used to just write shitty essays. but now i can't even churn a shitty essay out. i can't churn anything out. roar. anyway, i must say body combat is becoming increasingly embarrassing. =x in an addictive way. like you know it's embarrassing and you hate doing it but yet you like it at the same time and keep coming back. hahaha. but the taichi is really cool man! we should just have taichi and no body combat.

anyway. yesterday, woke up early to meet debs at holland v to studyy. uh finished my CRAPPY gp essay. and read a bit of econs. tsk i'm being so damn completely behind in my time table. bought my prettypinkfurry kitten heels from x:odus :D then went down for tuition. man i kept yawning. felt really bad yawning in her face repeatedly. but i really couldnt help it!! anyway she is nice and not offended (i think). heh. hitched a ride from deb's mum to the bus stop to get a cab. stupid 5 o clock is shift changing time so i got rejected by THREE CABS IN A ROW :( felt so retarded but luckily the next cabbie was kind and took pity on me and sent me to cine :)

met li and had dinner at yoshi before going in for the island. great movie! scarlett johansen (don't know how you spell this) has FLAWLESS skin. she has like ZERO pores. she looks freaking photoshopped! (ok i'm just jealous.) went up to top of the m at meritus mandrin. thanks for the drink! nice non-alco shirley temple. haha. had a really really really good time just chilling and relaxing there. :D

then headed down to indochine to join xue, grace, kx, chris, jacq, joan and jol. didnt plan on staying on for long. but kind of just did. haha. those dancing queens decided to go up and be the only ones on the dance floor. got dragged up too and i guess it was QUITE fun. hahaha. shared a nice drink with xuee. then went back before the last train. quite cinderella ish aye. haha

wenta the new church at riverlife today. i'm really liking that church :) hopefully i can make it my regular :) i've been online for the past four hours!! someone SHAKE ME AND REMIND ME THAT PRELIMS ARE THREE WEEKS AWAY!!!

i'll leave it in your hands. :)

saturday night with my girl (: 

ok, let's talk about yesterday first. haha. tm-ed with chels! :) spent my last day being seventeen with my fellow seventeener. hehe. lunch at billybombers was gooood. watched mindhunters. one freaky movie. so exciting i had to go to the toilet twice. haha but i think it was pretty cool. my kind of movie cept it was a little too gory. =x

today was a pretty good day. cept for the killer lessons. like econs overload in the morning, ganga and then my first double math tutorial. yuckyyy. but it was a short day! so yay. haha went off to holland v swensons with shar, debs, karen, fi and shishi. thank yous for giving up precious study time to hang out a little :D swensons fries are really goooood! then went back to school with shar for ocip. rahhh. damn long meeting. and i wasnt actually contributing much. haha but it was pretty cool hanging out at lynn's completely frog filled table. and the powerpoint's looking pretty nice and complete! can't wait to see it being played during assembly. haha

okay so now i'm eighteen. doesnt feel much different from seventeen really. haha but i'm a big girl now! thanks to everyone who remembered and wished me! haha really appreciate it :))

damn freaking tired and i've got a fully packed weekend ahead! roar. and i'm not following my studyplan! i hate studyplans! they only serve to help you see just how screwed you are. ok but anyway, i should stop rambling and go watch lost. haha

that was really all i needed :)

for every thing there comes a point, a point where it ends. i think this is that point.

you can't tell a story till it's finished.

(i really wanted to blog about today. but i couldnt. i should know, i tried about 5 times, typing and retyping. it's inexplicable really. maybe i'll blog about it tomorrow.)

wooot chinese papers are over for good baby. and the listening paper was really quite easy although i shan't speak too soon haha. today it rained so heavily it kind of almost flooded at the nls. QUITE fun running in the rain tho. squealing here and there and watching others run about (and even fall down :( ). saw the class pics. not too bad i suppose. could've been worse. don't understand why they are still charging us money for the photos, and 6 dollars per photo to boot! but fine. memories come with a price tag. today was like the first time i brought up my water bottle to the second level of the library. and bam, there was a spot check. thank goodness my bottle was small so i managed to sneak it under my sweater and escape discovery. it's so freaking retarded i dont understand why waterbottles arent allowed??? ok i'm trying to limit myself to an hour of computer a day. i can so do this man :D

let's see you turn this one around.

FIRST AND FOREMOST.

HAPPY SEVENTEENTH TO MY FAVOURITE PASIRISAN EVER RACHEL!! hope you had an awesome day and i love you!! :)))))

i can't believe i'm saying this, but body combat today was pretty fun. hahah. especially the taichi cool down thing. might try that the next time i get stressed or something. shitty thing was that we had to do it on the track and attracted quite a group of spectators. x( anyway, school today was good cos it wasnt as stressful as last friday. half an econs lesson only! and consultation got cancelled. i feel really bad for joycesaw cos she's just so damn nice but she's really ineffective and coughboring. and got stupid e1 presentation over and done with. yay.

had ocip meeting after school. when i walked in it was a little whoa cos like practically everyone was there. to me it was a bit surreal seeing these people outside the context of bintan even though we had facilitations and stuff before the trip. hmm oh wells. thankfully lynn wasnt there to notice we hadnt exactly done anything at all to the powerpoint we presented last week. haha.

dinner at the airport with sis and aunt. chuwanmushi (however the hell you spell that) at sakae totally rocks my white giodarno socks. haha.

yeah anyway, i've come to realise a whole new shitty emotion - the unjustified feeling of being cheated. hurrrr.

this is the blog of one hell of a chinese illiterate person. i think i screwed up my oral pretty darn badly. the passage was alright. but the conversational question was murder. when she asked the question, not one word made any sense to me. so while i panicked inwardly, i asked her to repeat the question. only to be greeted by a blank stare. (idiot.) and so i asked her to repeat again. and she did. and i was desperate and clueless so i started rambling about newater for quite a while before she stopped me to tell me that it was actually about the government letting the public use the reservoirs for activites or some shit like that. and i was like oh. ohhh. ohhhhh. and then went on to choke out some incoherent and pathetic comments. yeappp. so right now, i completely would not be very shocked if i did worse than a d7 for my chinese. with a fail in oral to boot. ha ha ha it's so not funny it is.

bummed around in nls before going for tuition. stress reliever there i must say haha. anyway tuition on thursdays is a killer. i got back at like 9plus today! thankfully it's gonna be on saturdays next week onwards woohoo!

lost is a great show. great great great.

sodamntired. dontfeellikegoingtoschooltomorrow. butishall. justbecause.

decided to behave like the student that's sitting for her prelims in four weeks time that i am, and went home straight after school. (ok nevermind that there was no one staying back to study, that grace didnt want to eat icecream with me and that i was excited to see the new computer. haha) but yeah anyway. didnt actually get to do anything cos by the time i finished my bath and sat my ass down for 5 seconds, my mum was calling me to go install some shit on the new computer. so in all my brilliance, i tinkered here and there and managed to get the printer and some other stuff installed. BUT. the most important thing, the bloody modem, refused to get installed. at first it worked, and i was so amazed at my techy skills. but then after like 5minutes, it died. and so i completely gave up and plonked myself on my bed and fell asleep for 2 hours. haha. woke up, and it was tvtime! so yeah. anyway it's back to the good ole cranky compy since the stupid new one is not compatible or something. roar. so much for that. oh wells. ok i should sleep. oral tmr! =x

i can't help but like this brand of undifferentiation.

every once in a while i do this to remind myself.

school was mighty torturous today. it felt like two days. seriously.

don't know what's wrong with myself. keep feeling really sick and nauseous. eyukkk.

i'm so happy i found my green highlighter! wheee.

to quote bree on desperate housewives, 'the best is yet to come' ayeee.
however, considering how her husband died, i wonder if 'the best' is actually sarcasm.

school is so blah.

phototaking. was like shit la. haha. our class has no 'special place' in the school cos we've never ever actually done anything all together before. yeah so ended up taking some pretty stupid and boring shots. '-' oh and the formal shots were killer man! who knew smiling could be so painful.

anyway mondays are shortdays! whoohoo. decided not to go for lit supp (but there wasnt any anyway) so went up to the library to meet lii and nic. ended up having some impromptu chinese oral prac with amanda and pinghui. haha. gawd it's in three days! then went over to join deb, sharm and zach to study a bit more. didnt actually do anything during the two hours there :( rargh. then went down for good prata! prata man is funny haha. uhhh sat around then got a lift to the station from debbie's mommy :) dont know why was having a damn damn bad headache. thankfully i got a seat and took a nice nap. REALLYREALLY don't feel like going to school tomorrow. TRIPLE LIT and TRIPLE ECONS and DOUBLE MATH. but i missed tues last week already :'(

i repeat, I HATE LIT. it's the bane of my exsistence. sucks man.

whyohwhyohwhyyyyyyyyyy??
you sidestepped a perfect chance.

i'm like suddenly in love with linjunjie again. haha his voice is like whoa silky man. that caoqitai guy is so irritating '-' like seriously, why on earth does mediacorp keep getting him to host shows!

anyway, new computer is coming on wednesday! i'm sooooooo excited!!!

fantastic four with liming today. pretty good movie! entertaining. bought a new water bottle! haha finally giving up on my poor scratched up and dented redbottie. it's pretty :D small and black with pink flipflops all over it. hahahah. yayay and thank you for the cd sweethearttt :)

trained back with sis. then headed down to greatworld for dinner with the rest of the family. zara was having some sale which was awesome. cos one, the greatworld outlet was relatively not crowded, two, there were actually some nice stuff and three, mum was being nice and letting me get stuff haha. there was this reallyreally cute off-shoulder sweater but all they had was L L L L and it was falling off like literally so i couldnt get it :( i'm pretty happy with the stuff i got tho! today just brought out the very small shopper in me.

i want...
pink ear studs from accessorize
pretty pink kitten heels from exodus
an off-shoulder sweater from anywhere
and a dashboard confessionals album!

need to save them moolah. so should not have spent 20bucks on lunch today! x(

i judge myself more than anyone else in this world cares to.

today was just jam-packed to the fullest-estness. my free periods practically didnt exist. and i hate hate hate lit. in hindsight, i should have hung on to history and dropped lit instead.

body combat is really funny. and i'm only saying this cos today i got to stand at the back. my body hurts like hell tho. because of the stupid situps/pushups at the end. and possibly also because i havent exercised in sooo long.

see, if i had blogged this at the 8.13 that blogger records i opened this page like i meant to, the post would have been entirely different. (it's 9.57 now btw)

and then, every thing's turned around.

know what's my form of catharsis?

solitare.

i increasingly don't like blogging here anymore.
i like it but i dont.

i feel like such a fool for bothering to listen. for bothering to act like i care. for bothering to pretend that you're right. for being bothered at all.

ok i have a whole shitload of things to do for school tomorrow. and i'm so freaking tired from school, from tuition and from the voice inside my head.

if i dont mind, it won't matter.
too bad i dont want it to matter only because i mind.

and no one would ever understand why.

mixed up times.
good music.
kind woman at taxi stand.
a day of meaningless motions.
love/hate.
the words we don't say.
height/weight.
nus talk.
i see you, do you see me too?
detour.
clementi.
kfc.
the conversation i think did me good.
scribbles and scrawls all the way home.
one tree hill - "whatever it is, you're gonna get something out of this."

i would, if i could
i'd do anything, spontaneously. - jason mraz, i'd do anything

i am bored. i have finished copying most of my j2 war lit stuff, so i shall make like a celebrity and do this quiz thing haha.

1) Name the last four things you bought.
kinder bueno, a new pink eraser, blue g-tec and rachel's present.

2) Name two things you usually drink.
water (wow i'm so healthy!) and orange juice.

3) Last time you cried?
i kind of did last night cos i was feeling like pure shit (physically.)

4) What's Your fave iPod colour?
this is like asking the obvious.. pink of course!

5) What's under your bed?
my floor.

6) What time did you wake up today?
6.30am - 40minutes too late haha.

7) Current hair?
um. i have no idea how you answer this.

8) Current clothes?
shirt and shorts.

9) Current desktop picture?
there's no picture, it's just plain. boring. blue.

10) Current worry?
possibly prelims. oh wait no, chinese oral comes first haha.

11) Current hate?
cashiers who move in sloooooow-mo.

12) Favorite place to be?
honestly, chilling in front of the computer/tv. haha

13) Play any instrument(s)?
well i used to play the guzheng but i havent touched it in a year and a half so...

14) Favourite colour(s)?
shade more than colour, but usually pink.

15) How tall are you?
last i measured i was 161cm.

16) What are you going to do after this?
i have no idea. there's no tv to watch tonight! :(

17) One person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to?
uh i partly dont really understand what this means and partly dont have an answer.

18) Favorite day(s)?
holidays, short days, happy days.

19) Where would you like to go?
korea, europe, australia, switzerland. all over the world!

20) Where do you want to live when you get married?
somewhere we both like.

21) Favorite food?
japanese food.

22) Color of most clothes you own?
pink.

23) Number of pillows you sleep with?
one. and i have a bolster too! :D

24) What do you wear when you go to sleep?
usually a big shirt.

25) What were you doing yesterday?
shopping/studying with my pinkie twin. :D
then getting sick from YUCKY DISGUSTING MOCHA BROWNIE.

26) What is the brand of your wallet?
mambo.

27) Last crush?
oh my gosh. skip! hahah

28) Last CD played?
Jason Mraz - Waiting For My Rocket To Come

29) Last thing you ate?
kinder beuno!

30) Last person you talked to?
my mum. she just passed me a drink haha.

riverlife in the morning. good speaker. but it was about marriage. and that's not the type of sermon you want to go for with your mum. it's just weird. especially when the topic is 'the five needs of a husband'.

bugis with chellies! too bad most of the shops were closed :( oh wells. got a new purse thing and a file and notebook so it's cool :) i hate going out in the weekends tho. too damn crowded.

one should not think too much aye?