don't know why i'm not sleeping.

debbietang this is all your fault, i've become readdicted to random ranting on my blog.

for no apparent reason, the phrase "why do we try" floated into my head. it seemed to sit nicely in line with what i thought i was feeling. it seemed like a good label to wear to indicate my mood. but then i realised, that no, it's not at all what i'm feeling. not why do we try. more like why do people try. because i dont try. and i feel something less than remorse at that but i'm not trying to change it. it seems that i've come to subscribe to the idea that nonchalance is the way to go. and when disruptions to that pop up i shut out and wait for it to pass. i fear this is not healthy. but i'm not doing anything about it. yes so basically. i am full of inertia and a stone. there are so many things i need to rectify but i get away with not doing so and so i dont. am i asking for a kick? maybe. but i resist kicks. so this is completely futile and i no longer know what i'm going on about.

i swear, it's my period that's putting me in this mood.

caught rendition with liming today! strange strange movie. great premise, great cast but somehow it was just so flat. so many things happening, but you're left feeling completely detached and unfeeling, save for a few moments of emotion that are so fleeting you dont even have the time to identify, classify or explore it.

side note, really love matchbox twenty's acoustic version of push.

havent done a proper blog post in eons. this is in bid to revive the blogging spirit but i dont feel it coming back anytime soon =x

hmmhmm. what's been happening. in no particular order..

i learnt how to eat sashimi! hahah. and it's pretty darn goooood. now i understand grace's (and who else i cant remember) obsession over it last time. this reminds me of how i'm always slow in discovering food (thaiexpress! yamiyoghurt!). i have all these stigmas associated to the food and my unadventurous nature doesnt help. haha.

caught superbad. not too bad, despite it's name. ha ha. kinda harold and kumar like, but more endearing i suppose.

camped out at ecp! second attempt at astrophotog but it's bloody hard man. those darn planets are so elusive!! it was pretty fun nevertheless. but sw and i were so cranky and sleepy the next day :x oh we also went to check out the giant telescope at nus high school that night. and i saw the craters on the moon again!! hahaha something about that just makes me very excited?? damn. inner geek clawing out here. hahah. yeah but besides the cool craters on the moon, i'm not really feeling this module at all man. dont think i've mentioned it, but i actually got a C+ for the midterms. and it was mcq. openbook. hahaha totally nothing to be proud of but i'm so amazed at my "anti-accomplishment".

lots of late night walks and supermarket shopping :):) and a trishaw ride that got rained on! hahaha.

grace's birthday steamboat! haha it was so like last year, but different. random, but i missed rachellllllllllllllllll! :(

attempted mugging sessions at sci library. that's our new hangout mann. anw, i kinda like this sem. for the fact that it's quite like a blur. i actually have zero term papers to write. and i dont seem to have anything to read. i dont know if it's cos i'm not putting in enough effort or because this sem is really that slack. kinda freaky/cool, but only about three more weeks left??

strangely enough, blogging has lost it's cathartic effect. or maybe i've lost the ability to ramble on about everything and anything.

am so very sleepy in school now. camped out on the 6th floor of the (surprisingly) nice sci library. the yellow walls, big windows, and general lack of a crowd are making me happy :D sw has gotten too comfortable and is happily plonked on the table SNOOZING. man, i miss blogging for both of us. hahah.

here ends yet another random post. two more studying hours to clock in so shall go listen to webcast lectures now. zzzzzzzzzzzz.

am so totally completely neglecting my work. dont want to study anymore :(

fixing is such a tiring thing. and i have such a bad attitude.

anyway, ew just ate very gross carrot cake that was supposed to be comfort food for today's taxing econs paper. hate it when something that's supposed to help you feel better just ends up making you feel worse :

when things happen, it seems, they happen in chunks man.


got things to rant about and make stands on but have simply no freaking time thanks to the two consecutive stats tests coming uppppp :(


was kinda freaking stressing out just now until i saw this.


hahaha man.

am greatly tired! yet i dont go and sleep. what is wrong with me?? but actually i've been having problems getting to sleep lately. and then even greater problems getting my ass out of bed.

hate it when buses break down! i hate alot of things about public transport. grrr. if i could walk fast enough, i would walk everywhere. hahah.

stats stats stats. ppl keep asking me why on earth i'm doing stats. for econs somemore. when i'm not even an econs major/minor. when they put it that way, i wonder too.

ok this was in bid to make my posts longer and not just one/two liners. i realise they are all rants. hurr ok too sleepy to care. zzzzzzzz.

today's one of those (recently) rare days i feel happy for absolutely no reason at all. just had to get that down. :)