it feels like i just woke up from a dream.

the past 8days have been so completely weird and eventful and emotionally fluctuating i dont think i would be able to put it down to words right here right now, or ever even.

in all honesty, i do miss bintan. despite the flush-less toilets, the disgusting weather, the 'older and wiser' Adults, the very iffy conditions of the beds, the long drawn facilitations, never being able to feel completely clean etcetc. in a sense, missing home from there felt better than being at home in actual reality right now.

and i feel completely disorientated. taken away from the routine of waking up at about 6.50am (bintan time) by my own body clock, trudging to the toilet and brushing my teeth half asleep with random people walking here and there, sitting on my bed (or mattress actually) and just stoning waiting for it to be time to walk over to the canteen, walking over to the canteen, sitting down at the table and preparing to charge to the only flushing toilet (come to think of it) i ever saw in the whole of freaking non resort part of bintan, eating the pretty nice breakfast, getting into our aircon-less and tiny bus, busing pass a stretch where it always stinks, pass the secuirty gate and into EKANG ANCULAI, seeing the kids jump and wave excitedly, getting off the bus and heading over to the library for some mindy water, grabbing teaching materials and entering the completely fan-less classroom with broken tables but kids with full on smiles, smiling excessively and shouting encouraging 'good's and clapping at every little thing the kids do, taking them outside to play games, lunch break in the library, the packet lunches with the signature cold and overly bouncy rice and keropok and other packeted ingredients, lazing about outside the library, 'tanning', lesson time with our favourite afternoon class, busing back to the dorms, mad rush to coordinate bathtime order, 5minute baths, my jolene in shining armor to kick open the stubborn door, lazing about waiting for dinner time, dinner time, pasar oleholeh, haagen daz, the walk back to the dorms, facilitation, mass brushing teeth in the darkness, lying around waiting for lights out, lights out, and the tossing and turning to sleep. that would be a typical day in bintan. some day i'll record down each day as i remembered them. not tonight. i think i might be suffering from 'jet lag' soon.

so much more to say actually. but not now. sleep now.